Forgiveness
by Lastsyns
Summary: Rose and the Doctor are forced to consummate at a Spring Festival. Now can she ever forgive him.
1. The Spring Festival

He hadn't meant to bring them here. It was the spring festival and everyone running around happily. The crops had been planted and they were celebrating and looking forward to a good harvest come fall. Normally this would be something he would be happy to be at but not in this case. In this case part of there celebration was the festival of fertility where two out worlders were chosen to consummate in front of a small group. Rose and him had been chosen the minute they stepped off the Tardis. They told her she would be the center of the festival and she was happy, not knowing what they had planned.

She was dressed in the flowing white dress and was barefoot. They had done her long blond hair up in a high pony tail and had ringlets of hair falling by her face. They had put little white flowers in her hair, she had never looked more beautiful but he felt sick. He tried to smile and think of a way out of it but they had only two choices. Either they had sex to celebrate the harvest or their blood would be spilled to preserve it.

He carefully dressed in the white shirt and long pants they had given him and was barefoot as well, he felt the cool Earth below his feet. He walked up to Rose and gently took her hand and led her to the area where a feast was taking place. From here he could see the Tardis surrounded by guards, keeping watch to make sure that he didn't flee. He could also see two other guard nearby keeping an eye on them to make sure they didn't run off.

He walked over to a table and pulled out her chair before sitting down himself.

"Rose," He said quietly still staring forward. "You do understand what is happening, don't you?"

"We have been chosen as their King and Queen."

"In a way I suppose." He looked at her feeling ill. "We have been chosen to consummate in order to bring a good crop followed by a good harvest."

"What?" She asked?"

"There is no choice," He nodded towards the guards, "It's either this or blood."

"Meaning," and she turned pale as he lifted his eyebrow at her. She swallowed hard. The festival went on around them until as the sun set they were led to a circle of people who were wearing robes and kneeling in front on a small platform. He walked Rose to the platform and she sat down. She was shaking violently. He had wanted to do this since the first day he had met her, but not like this.

"I'm sorry." He whispered as he gently laid her down. He kissed her on the forehead. he gently moved her legs apart and laid down on top of her. She smiled gently up at him. "Are you okay?" He asked gently as he kissed her cheek.

"Fine, lets just get this over with?" She answered him. He nodded and sat up a little and then leaned down and lifted her dress helping her to slip it off. He looked down at her body and could feel himself getting hard as he looked at her. She reached down and undid his pants and helped him slip them and his boxers off. He laid back down on her and started kissing her neck, as he moved himself to enter her. He pressed gently against her opening and found her to be barely wet. Not wanting to hurt her he slowly ran his hand up her body and scratched softly along her side. Not being able to help herself she moaned lightly at his touch.

He continued to stroke her as he started to gently move into her. She tensed up before he could get in very far and he saw the pain in her eyes as he slipped the rest of the way in. "I'm sorry." He said again.

"Stop apologizing and lets just get this over with." She grumbled at him. He started moving inside of her and she closed her eyes and turned her head to the side. He kept moving gently until he felt his release coming and then not being up to help himself, slammed into her as he reached his peak. He lay there for a few moments still inside of her before he pulled out. She slowly sat up and he put on his pants as she pulled back on her dress. She had tears in her eyes as he helped her stand up and they walked out of the circle.

"Can we leave yet?" she asked quietly.

"Not yet," He replied. "Soon, I promise." The festivities continued into the night and finally they were allowed to leave. He watched as she quickly disappeared in to the back of the Tardis. He quickly got off the planet and then went to find her to make sure she was okay. He heard the water running in the bathroom and knocked gently on the door.

"Rose are you okay?" He asked through the door concerned.

"Fine," She answered back, her voice shaking.

He opened the door to see her sitting on the bottom of the shower with her knees drawn up to her chest. "I said I'm fine," She said angry.

"Rose," He said gently sitting on the edge.

"If you wanted to have sex why didn't you just say so, why did you have to put me through that." She cried. "I thought you loved me."

"I didn't mean to land there." He replied and he could tell by the look on her face that she didn't believe him. He reached out to touch her and she jerked back.

"Please just leave me alone," She cried.

"Rose."

"Please, Doctor," and with both his hearts breaking he left the room.

* * *

_Possible one shot. Let me know what you think and if you think I should continue. _


	2. Anger and Drinking

_Thank you for all the reviews and all the encouragement to keep going. _

* * *

She had been sitting in the bottom of the shower for awhile and finally stood up. She scrubbed every inch of her body until her skin was red but still she didn't feel clean. She thought he loved her, but if he truly did, he wouldn't have done this to her. She never wanted him to touch her again. She reached down to clean between her legs and shuddered at the soreness. She removed her hand and looked at it seeing faint traces of blood.

When she saw the blood she felt her stomach turn and she barely made it to the toilet before she threw up every thing she had eaten. She stood up shaking and flushed. She wrapped the towel tightly around her body and then opened the door and peeked out to make sure he wasn't around. She headed to her room to get dressed.

* * *

Once he left the bathroom he went to his room to get out of the long white outfit. He showered and then dressed in his pinstripe suit. He briefly thought about what to do with the white outfit before deciding he never wanted to see it again. He threw the outfit away before heading back to the control room. It was only a matter of time before she asked to go home. He set the controls for the Powell Estate and then sat down. He was still sitting in the pilot seat when he heard her come in.

"That's not going to help." He said as he got a strong smell of alcohol coming from her. He looked behind him to see her standing in the corridor wearing a pair of sweats and a oversize sweater. In her left hand she held a bottle of whiskey.

"Couldn't hurt anymore." She stormed over to him standing just out of his reach. "Mickey is right, you are just like any other bloke."

"Rose, I'm sorr..."

"Stop apologizing." She screamed. "You enjoyed it, you came. Now I am going to get pregnant and have some two headed devil child."

He stood up and she shrunk back away from him. He resisted the urge to try to hold her. "Rose, I didn't enjoy it." He said trying to keep his voice as calm as possible even though on the inside he was screaming. She rolled her eyes at him as he continued. "I didn't want this. I only had sex.."

"Raped," She interrupted again. He glared at her and started talking again though this time the calmness was gone.

"I did it to save your life. If we didn't we still would have ended up at that platform but they would have slit our throats instead. Would you rather be dead?"

She didn't answer him as she took another drink from the bottle. He reached for it and she jerked her arm away roughly, stumbled backwards and fell hard onto the control room floor.

He knelt down in front of her. "Are you all right?"

"No."

He reached out to her and she screamed. "Don't touch me." He pulled back quickly and then stood up and stared at her. She got on to her hands and knees and then grabbed on to the console to pull herself up. He could clearly see cuts on her hand from the grating on the floor but instead of trying to help her he watched as she stumbled out of the room and back into the corridors.

He stood there for a few more moments before flicking the lever to send the Tardis to London. He ran his hands through his hair and then down his face. Jackie was going to kill him, but right now Rose needed her mother.


	3. The Powell Estate

He landed the Tardis and then went to find Rose. She wasn't in her room, the living area, library, kitchen or dining room. He checked various other rooms before finding her in an unused den. She was laying half on the couch with her feet in the air. The bottle of whiskey was spilled on its side beside her.

"Go away," She said as he entered the room. He ignored her and walked in and picked up the bottle.

"Come on." He said "I've brought you home."

"So now you're trying to get rid of me?" Rose slurred. "Figures, sleep with the girl then dump her."

"Come on," He said angry pulling her to her feet despite her protest. She stumbled towards the door and he followed her out of the room and through the control room. She opened the door and stepped out. He took a deep breath before following her. The last place he wanted to go was to her apartment but he couldn't let her climb the stairs alone in her inebriated state.

Almost as soon as she knocked on the door it opened and she pushed past her mom and into the apartment. He started to turn away and heard Jackie say. "Oh no you don't mister. What happened to my daughter?" He turned back towards her and turned pale. He opened his mouth "Well I-I-I, I mean we-we." He reached back and rubbed his neck.

He flinched slightly as her eyes grew wide and she raised her hand. He expected to get slapped but her hand turned into a fist as it got close to his face and he was knocked slightly backwards.

"You can leave now." She said as she slammed the door on him.

He stood there slightly stunned before heading back to the Tardis. He was tempted to leave but he couldn't make it any worse by abandoning her. Tasting blood he wandered into the wardrobe and looked at himself in the mirror. A bruise was forming along his jaw where Jackie had punched him. He reached up and gingerly touched it. He loosened his tie feeling defeated and headed to bed.

* * *

Rose was laying on her bed in her room when her mom entered with a cup of tea. "Are you okay sweetie." She asked concerned, setting the tea on the nightstand and sitting down on the edge of the bed.

"I'm fine."

"What happened?"

"I don't want to talk about it."

"You and he didn't." Rose looked at her. "Oh Rose, you didn't. You're not pregnant are you?"

"No," She answered her mother. "Look mum, I'm really tired. I just want to sleep."

"All right sweetheart. I'll be in the living room if you need me."

She waited until her mom was out of the room before burying her face in her pillow and crying herself to sleep.

* * *

He was still laying on his bed on his back, half awake brooding when he saw Rose in the doorway of the bedroom. "How can you be okay with this?" She asked him.

"I'm not." He replied looking up at the ceiling, refusing to meet her eyes.

He heard her move further into the room. "My mom do that."

"Yep." He drew the word out and popped the p at the end.

"Talk to me."

He turned his eyes to look at her. She was sitting now in the arm chair in his room. She was wearing a pair of jeans and a simple t-shirt, with her hair pulled back in a loose pony tail. "I didn't tell her. She never would have let me come back if I did."

He looked back up at the ceiling. "You shouldn't lie to her."

"Do you have a death wish?" She asked getting a small smile out of him. "Tell me the truth. Did you mean to take me to that festival."

"No."

"Liar." She responded.

He sat up and looked at her. "Oh think about it logically Rose, if I wanted to rape you. I mean really rape you. You really think I would want witnesses? I could have all the times we were alone on the Tardis together." He felt slightly sad about how pale she turned at his words and also very sick. "But I wouldn't do that and if you haven't realized that by now then maybe we shouldn't travel together anymore." He fell back against the pillows and folded his hands across his chest.

* * *

_Thank you to all my followers and people who have read this story. I love the Reviews and hope they continue. I am always open to suggestions of what you would like to see and a special thanks to totallyau. I just didn't think a slap was enough. _


	4. Distractions

After awhile he turned to look at Rose again. She was still in the armchair but she had curled up and was starting at him.

"So not going anywhere then?" He asked her.

"No."

"Good. So you believe me then?" She shook her head no in response. "So do you trust me?"

"I'll try." She responded giving him a small smile.

"I suppose it's a start." He pulled on his ear." It will have to work for now." He sat up and got out of bed walking over to her. "How about some breakfast?" He held out his hand and she eyed it suspiciously. He shrugged and walked out of the room to the kitchen.

"You do know it's dinnertime." Rose commented as she entered the room.

"Never to late for breakfast." He said smiling at her.

After they ate, he stood up suddenly and bounded across the room. "I'm bored. Lets have some fun shall we." He picked up his converse off the floor and ran barefoot into the control room. He smiled at her as he set the controls to random and flicked the lever to send the Tardis into the vortex. As the Tardis sped on it's way, he put his shoes on and fixed the buttons on his jacket.

He landed the Tardis and then walked over to grab his coat and head out the door. Rose followed behind him and he stuck his hands in his pockets to keep from taking her hand like normal.

"It's a spaceship." She said as they exited.

"Yes, it is." He replied looking around. "51st century and human in origin, from the looks of it." He walked over to a display screen and soniced it. "That's odd." He commented.

"What is?"

"Well this ship is a passenger ship, so where are all the passengers? According to this there two only two life signs on board." Curious he strolled down the long corridor and opened the first door he came to. There was nobody inside but the room looked like it was waiting for the inhabitant to come back. The bed was unmade and on the bed sat a suitcase with various clothing items strewn about. He closed the door and then walked across the hall and opened the next door to find the same thing.

"What happened?" Rose asked him.

"I don't know, but stay close just in case."

By passing the other doors he made his was to the end of the corridor to a door marked "3rd floor lounge." He opened the door and walked in. The room was deserted, though various plates and glasses strewn about suggested that somebody had been there recently. He moved further in and saw a man laying in the middle of the room. He rushed over to the man, knelt down and scanned him with the sonic.

"He's dead," he said quietly. "Electrocuted, But by what." He stood up and started to sonic the room around him, finding nothing. He kept sonicing and headed out of the door. As he headed back down the corridor towards the Tardis, he got his answer in the form of the sound of metal feet marching towards them. Thinking quickly he grabbed Rose, unlocked the nearest door, and pushed her into it, closing the door tightly behind them. He turned to look at her to discover that it was little more then a storage cupboard that they were standing in. Rose began to scream and try to push past him.

"Shh, Shh, Rose quiet." He whispered to her, but when the screaming didn't stop he grabbed her and placed his hand over her mouth.

In retrospect if pushing her into the cupboard had been a bad idea, then covering her mouth as she started to panic was just plain dumb and he was quickly rewarded for his stupidity with a swift knee to the groin.

He let go of her momentarily as he doubled over in pain.

She screamed and he quickly stood up and covered her mouth again. Even though he was prepared for her knee this time, he wasn't able to dodge it in time and his stomach churned violently when it made contact for the second time.

"Rose," He hissed," listen to me. There are cybermen on the other side of that door. You have got to calm down."

Her eyes stayed wide but her screams went silent. He slowly removed his hand and placed his ear against the door. The sound of metal footsteps came closer and then stopped. They were trapped.


	5. The Cybermen

He turned to Rose and looked at her apologetic for a brief second before he grabbed her hand and then threw the door open hard and fast at the cybermen. He pulled her out and ran as quickly as he could back towards the lounge to the set of stairs he had seen. She wrenched her hand loose from his and ran ahead of him.

"Delete, Delete." He heard the Cybermen say behind him and he flung open the nearest door open to try to slow them down. He heard it explode behind him and Rose gave a frightened squeal as they hurried faster.

"Come on up the stairs," He said to Rose. They ran up the stairs and to the next hallway taking them further away from the cybermen but also the Tardis. He could still hear the sound of metal feet behind them and kept running down the halls and up stairs until finally he stopped and tried to figure out where they were.

"Rose, look for a computer, a screen, anything." He said looking around.

"Over here," She called out a few minutes later and he rushed over to her, pulling out his sonic. He inadvertently put her between him and the screen and she let out a small squeak. Annoyance crossed his face and he stepped back to let her move before going back to the screen.

"This has to stop." He told her as he started scanning for information.

"I'm tying." She replied.

"Didn't feel like it." He grumbled. He still felt slightly sick.

"You scared me." She told him crossing her arms.

"Aha," He said excitedly and she jumped. "If we loop around we can get to the crew passage ways which will lead us directly back to the Tardis. Only problem is that there are two people alive on the floor above us and the cybermen are heading that direction."

He grabbed his hair. "Think, think, think." He said to himself.

"We can't leave them."

He turned to look at Rose. "No we can't. You're going to have to go after them."

"What by myself?"

"It's easy," He walked over to the screen and soniced a map up. "Just go up the next flight of stairs. They should be about here." He pointed to a room on the map. "Then just head as quickly as you can back down the stairs and through the crew quarters back to the Tardis."

"What are you going to be doing?"

"I'm going to provide a distraction." Before she could stop him, he grabbed her head, kissed it and then ran out the door. He could see the Cybermen ahead of him, they were heading towards the stairs.

"Hey," He screamed and then picked up the nearest thing to him and threw it at them. They stopped and turned to look at him. "Come on, catch me." He called and took off running. He ran slower then he wanted to making sure they could always see where he was going but staying far ahead of them as he led them away from the Tardis and the people above him. His foot caught on the edge of the carpet and he fell hard. Getting up but limping slightly he hurried on his way, dodging as a red laser blew up the table next to him.

How he made it to the top deck, he wasn't quite sure but as he emerged from the stairs he was briefly awestruck by the sight of the planet below in front of the twin suns. The floor was open to the sky and only a force field kept him safe on this level of the ship. He ducked around the corner and into a small room, where he found another screen. He quickly soniced it and found two life forms down by the Tardis and a third heading up the stairs. He suddenly had an idea but he was going to have to work quickly. He soniced the screen bringing up the defenses on the ship. He brought up the one controlling the force field and began to hack into it. He heard the Cybermen getting closer, right as he managed to get through. Taking a deep breath, he apologized silently to Rose and waited.


	6. Giving up

The sound of gunfire interrupted his plans Momentarily. He rushed out of the room to see a strange man standing there and two cybermen laying on the deck. "Guns don't work." He said rushing over and sonicing the cybermen.

"Normal guns don't work." The man responded.

"Where's Rose," He asked looking at the results.

"Is that the girls name." He rolled his eyes and tried a different approach.

"My name is the Doctor, what's yours?"

"Doctor, Doctor what?

He lifted his eyebrow up at the man and stared at him. "Right... Allons-y." He said and started to head back towards the Tardis.

He saw Rose and forgetting for a moment, headed quickly over to give her a hug. She crossed her arms and backed away from him and he stopped. He turned instead to the man who was hugging a small child.

"I can give you a lift home." He said looking at the two. "Where are you from?"

"Everywhere."

He was beginning to wish he would have just left the man where he was. He rubbed his head in frustration.

"Where do you want to go then?"

"We drift, Doctor What, anywhere the stars take us." He turned to Rose who was biting her lip to keep from laughing. He opened the door.

"Get on."

He watched them walk on to the Tardis before heading on and closing the door behind him. He headed quickly over to the controls and set the coordinates to the planet below them. Landing he scanned it and saw that while not inhabited it could contain life. As tempted as he was to leave the man there, he couldn't do that to the child and instead set the coordinates to a planet similar to earth.

He waved the man off happily and closed the door tightly behind him before heading back to the controls. When the Tardis landed again, he looked at Rose and motioned to the doors. He watched as she happily raced to the door and opened it. Her face fell when she looked outside to see the Powell Estate.

"You brought me home again?"

"You obviously don't want to travel with me and don't trust me. I can't travel with someone who can't trust me. You almost got us killed today." He said not looking up as he walked slowly around the console flicking switches.

He looked up as she slammed the door to see her still standing there. "I'm not going anywhere." She crossed her arms and stared at him.

"You do know I could dematerialize the Tardis around you." He said absently.

"You wouldn't dare." She snipped.

He flicked a couple of more switches and then took hold of the lever that would send the Tardis off and stared at her. His hand slipped off when he saw the tears in her eyes. Anger he could handle, but he hated seeing her cry. Frustration filled him as he unset the controls, kicked the console and then stormed out of the room.

Her sobbing got louder as he left and paced the corridors. He didn't know where he was going but he needed to keep moving. His walking gave way to running and he ran until both his hearts were pounding, his lungs ached and his muscles were screaming at him. He slowed down and as he turned another corner he saw the entrance to the control room. He walked slowly into it and found Rose sitting on the pilot seat. She looked up as he entered the room and then moved over so he could sit next to her.

"Thanks," He panted falling into the seat and he felt angry as she stood up and left the room. Moments later his anger turned to guilt as she came back with a glass of water and handed it to him.

"You scare me." She said leaning on to the console.

"But still you stay."

"I never thought you would be capable of raping anyone."

"I told you why it was happening before I even led you to that platform."

"I know," She said and her voice started to quiver again. "I just didn't believe you. I kept thinking this is all a joke, until you were, you were." She paused and took a deep breath. "Until you were inside me."

"You make it sound like I wanted to do it. I have told you time and time again Rose. I did not take you to that planet on purpose. I never planned on having sex with you." He saw the tears flowing from her eyes again. "You know how I feel about you Rose." She nodded. "But you also know I never would have let myself get so close." She turned away from him.

He reached out and touched her chin and was slightly surprised when she didn't pull away. He turned her face to look at him, before removing his hand as he saw the repulsion in her eyes at his touch. He stood up.

"I can't do this." He said and left the room. He headed to his room and was relieved when it was one of the first doors he came to. He went in, stripped and went to the shower. He turned the water on and stood beneath the shower head just letting the water run over him as he cried.


	7. Return to the Powell Estate

He was exhausted. He had all ready slept more then he normally needed too but he was tired from all the running and then from crying. He dragged himself out of the shower and dried off. Not bothering to dress he went to bed and pulled the blankets over himself and closed his eyes. But sleep alluded him. He kept thinking of Rose and the repulsion in her eyes at his touch. He tossed and turned for awhile before giving up on sleep and getting out of bed. He pulled on his boxers and trousers but didn't bother to dress anymore then that before he left his room and headed to the kitchen to look for some comfort food.

He almost skipped the idea all together when he saw Rose sitting at the small table picking at a plate of chips. Her eyes were red and puffy and her face still glistened with tears. He went in and sat in the chair next to her and took one of her chips and popped it into his mouth.

"These aren't from the Tardis," he said chewing slowly.

"No, mum brought them by while you were sulking." She told him.

"I was showering and Jackie was here? She still on board somewhere?" He looked around and was relieved when Rose shook her head no. He really didn't want to get hit again, his cheek still felt bruised from their last encounter.

"She wanted me to come home with her and I told her the same thing I told you. I'm not going anywhere."

He reached over and took her hand and while she flinched, she didn't pull away so he clung to it gently but desperately. In this regeneration he needed to be touched and so to be deprived of something so simple was driving him insane. He looked at her and saw that she was fighting to keep her hand where it was so after a minute he let it go and he saw the relief on her face.

He ignored the look and grabbed for another of her chips. "Don't touch my chips." She said and he turned and saw a mischivious grin on her face. He grabbed another and at it and then smiled when she put her hand around them and pulled them closer to her. He reached over her arm to grab another smiling playfully. She laughed and held them over her head and he stood up to try to grab another. Their game continued until the remains of the chips were spilled on the floor. He helped her clean them up and she crossed her arms at him.

"I wasn't done." She pouted.

"Then let's go find more." He said playfully and reached down to help her up. She ignored his offer of his hand and he found that while irritated it didn't make him mad this time.

"You need to get dressed first."

He disappeared to his room and finished getting dressed before heading out to the control room to where she was waiting for him.

"Allons-y" He said grabbing his coat and rushing out the door. She followed him and together they walked side by side to the little diner by her mom's house. She ordered more chips while he ordered banana cream pie. After finishing their food, reluctantly he agreed to go to Jackies.

Rose opened the door and went in and he followed slowly behind. Jackie came in from the kitchen and grabbed Rose giving her a big hug before she turned to him. He closed his eyes and braced himself to get hit again.

"Tea?" She asked.

"Sorry," He said, opening one eye and looking at her.

"Would you like some tea?"

"Oh, please." He replied and headed into the living room and sitting on his favorite corner of the couch. He turned to Rose. "She's not going to poison me, is she?"

Rose just shrugged as Jackie came in with three cups. "Here we are." She sat them down and then sat down herself. "So what happened."

"What makes you think something happened?" Rose said shortly.

"I'm not stupid. You can't stop crying and he looks guilty."

"I'm not crying now."

"Yea, well he still looks guilty."

He picked up his tea to try and hide his face and nearly choked when he took a drink. He slowly sat the cup down again as Jackie stared at him.

"I think I need some air," He said finally and started to stand up.

"Sit down," Jackie said sternly and surprising himself he listened. "Now talk."

"Mum, nothing happened. We had a misunderstanding. That was it." Rose said. Her eyes pleading with him to agree with her.

"Is that all?" Jackie asked still staring at him.

He looked at Rose and she mouthed the words, "Please Doctor," he sighed. "Yeah, that was pretty much it." She looked at him thankfully before he turned away. Jackie happily talked the afternoon away but he ignored her, choosing instead to stare out the window. He fell asleep at one point and woke up to find it was night outside and he was covered by a blanket. Rose was nearby watching the Telly silently.

"Where's Jackie?" He asked her sitting up and stretching.

"She's gone to bed."

"You really should tell her the truth."

"She'll kill you." Rose enunciated the words slowly at him. She yawned and stood up. "I'm going to bed. G'night."

"Night," he said and watched her disappear into her room. He laid down on the couch and closed his eyes.


	8. Time to Think

He woke up early and looked in on Rose, before heading to the kitchen. He put the tea kettle on and took it off as it began to whistle not wanting to wake the house. He was on his third cup of tea when Jackie came into the kitchen.

"Morning." He said to her.

"Morning," She replied and poured herself a cup before sitting down at the table across from him and sipping it. "What happened?" She asked him.

"Pardon,"

"I'm not stupid Doctor, it was more then a misunderstanding."

He sighed and took another drink trying to figure out how to word it so that she wouldn't kill him. He really liked the way he looked at the moment and didn't want to regenerate. "Rose and I participated in a festival that didn't go as planned." Jackie's eyes narrowed. "She's fine, I'm fine." He added quickly.

"Is she pregnant."

"No, no, no, no, no, no, no." He answered turning pale.

"Enough no's there," Rose teased him entering the room and stealing his tea, sat down next to her mom. "I think you've had enough."

He smiled weakly at her while everything in him screamed to run. He reached over and took her hand and gently rubbed the back of it with his thumb. He watched as repulsion in her eyes was slowly changed to annoyance. He let go of her hand and she pulled it away and hid it under the table from him.

"What kind of Festival was it?" Jackie asked suddenly.

"You told her," Rose sounded appalled.

"No, and it was a spring festival. They throw it every year to celebrate the planting and to look forward to a good harvest." He explained. Roses eyes narrowed at him at his explanation.

"So you did know about it."

"I had been there before yes, But I didn't take you there on purpose." It was his turn to plead with her. He loved her and understood that the last few days had been very hard on her, but he knew he couldn't keep doing this. Rose stood up and left the room and a few minutes later he heard the shower start. He looked at Jackie before standing up and leaving the apartment.

He headed down the stairs and to the Tardis. He opened the door and let himself on before heading to the console and set the coordinates. He flicked the lever and sent the Tardis off leaving Rose behind. He needed to clear his head and be alone for awhile. He landed the Tardis on Woman's Wept and walked out to stare at the waves frozen in time. He thought about the last time he was here with Rose. They had raced between the waves laughing. He walked over and gently touched one of the sides feeling the cold beneath his hand.

He thought about the young girl from Satellite 5. If she hadn't been killed in the Dalek attack he had planned to bring her with him. Would Rose still have continued to travel with him after he had regenerated if she had been aboard, he wondered. Would he have had the same feelings for Lynda? He shook his head and instead turned his thoughts to Grace.

He had loved Grace too in his own way. He remembered all the things he had wanted to do to her. He pictured the two of them laying on his bed in the Tardis. Her moaning as he moved inside of her and screaming his name. Feeling guilty about his thoughts he quickly headed back to the Tardis. He had come to Woman's wept to try to clear his head and now he was more confused then ever. He land the Tardis back by the Powell Estate. He didn't even have time to head off when the door flew open and Rose stormed on.

"You left me." She said indignantly.

"I just needed to think." He replied. "I wasn't gone that long was I?"

She shook her head. "Only about an hour." She told him. "Did it help?"

"No," He admitted. He walked over to her and cupped her chin gently in his hand. He saw the confusion and fear pass over her eyes as he leaned in close to her and pressed his lips against hers. She tensed up and did't return the kiss. He lifted his head and stepped back.

"Close the door," he said heading back to the console. He sat down on the pilot seat and watched her as she stood frozen for a minute before turning and closing the door. She headed over to the console and stood by him.

"So where are we going." She asked him, her voice shaky.

"Where do you want to go? All of space and time, it's your choice." He stood up and made sure to brush her hand as he moved to the controls.

"I want to see the stars." She said finally.

"I know just the place." He set the coordinates and came over to stand next to her. He made sure their shoulders touched briefly before standing close to her. She stepped casually aside and he waited a moment following making sure to bump their feet as he moved over. She eyed him suspiciously but if she realized what he was doing she wasn't going to call him on it.

He smiled to himself, if she was going to stay he was going to get her trust and affection back. It was only a matter of time.


	9. Barcelona

He turned and smiled at Rose. "I'll be right back." He brushed her arm as he walked out of the room and then headed straight for her room. Opening the door he went inside and dug out a red sweatshirt with a zipper going part way down and a p on the upper right hand corner. He found a white undershirt and a pair of black pants.

"Go get dressed." He said happily returning to the control room. She looked at him confused.

"Where are we going?" She asked.

"You'll see, just go get dressed, your clothes are on your bed." He changed the coordinates while she was gone and was landing the Tardis as she came into the room. He looked at her. "Recognize the outfit?" He asked her.

"Should I, I mean I must have worn a similar one a thousand times."

"Yes, but this the one that you were wearing the day I regenerated aboard the gamestation. One of the last things I told you was I wanted to take you to Barcelona, the planet, not the city. And the first thing I saw when I opened my new eyes was you in that outfit. I still wanted to take you to Barcelona but something had gone wrong." He walked to the doors and flung them open.

"So here it is my last and first ever promise to you. Barcelona." He grabbed his coat as she stepped forward and out the doors on to the beach. He closed the doors behind him and then turned to look at her. She was awestruck. The beach seemed to stretch for miles in the distance and the waves lapped gently at it. Aliens of every different sort were on the beach or in the water beneath the bright blue sky with the red sun.

He offered her his arm and without thinking she wrapped her hand around it as, he led her across the beach to a boardwalk. He noticed the moment she was holding his arm as fear flashed quickly across her eyes and she started to move it. But just as quickly he saw amazement return and she started pulling him. He looked up and saw a dog with no nose up ahead.

"You weren't kidding." She said letting go of his arm at last to lean down and look at the dog closer. He watched as she pet the dog for a few moments before standing up to look at him.

"Where to now?" She asked happily, and took his arm again.

"I know just the place." He led her down a set of stairs to a small hole in the wall diner. He held the door open as she entered and then followed her in. Walking up to the counter he placed the order. Once it had arrived he paid and then went to sit across from her at the table. Her face lit up.

"Chips," She exclaimed and picked on up and happily took a bite. "Oh my god, these are amazing."

"You like them." He said starting on his own.

"I love them. You have been holding out on me." She said playfully. "Can I live here?"

"Can you imagine me living in a house?" He joked back.

"Who said you could stay, it would be awkward between me and the chips with you there."

"Oi" He said and stuck his lip out.

She finished her chips and his before they left the diner and he walked with her out on the beach. As the sun began to set she stretched and yawned. "Time to get back to the Tardis." She exclaimed.

"Not quite yet," He said and took off his coat and laid it down on the beach. He laid down on it and patted the empty side for her to do the same. She hesitated before sitting down.

"You're going to miss it." He told her. "Now lay down. I promise it will be okay." She hesitated for a few more moments and then laid down keeping her distance. As the sun finished setting the stars were becoming visible and for the first time she noticed that the planet had three moons.

"Doctor," She asked confused.

"Just wait." He said quietly. It started slow almost easy to miss but soon the sky was streaked with Meteors. She gasped and moved a little closer to him. He reached down and took her hand and she gently squeezed his back.

Later that night after the showers had begun to die down he stood up and took her hand and led her back to the Tardis. He didn't let go of her hand as he led her to her room and stopped outside of her door.

"I had fun today, thank you, that was amazing." She said finally letting go of his hand. He leaned forward slowly watching her reaction the whole time. He gently placed his mouth upon hers and was happy when she returned his kiss. He kissed her passionately for a few moments before leaning back.

"Sleep well, Rose Tyler." He told her as she opened the door to her room and went inside.

"You too, Doctor," She responded as she closed the door. He smiled and strolled to the control room. His plan was almost complete.


	10. New Earth

She was sitting on her bed. She reached up and gently touched her mouth. She could still feel his kiss on her lips. What surprised her even more is that she hadn't hated it. He had been gentle yet passionate. She had been lost in the moment when he kissed her and she realized that she hadn't flinched from him.

She could, however, still feel every single place he had touched on her arms and her hand and that was beginning to bug her. She stood up and headed to the shower.

-DW-

He crawled underneath the Tardis console intent on making some repairs he thought were necessary. But as he laid there on his back staring up into the wires all he could think of was that she still didn't trust him that much. Sure she had let him kiss her and hold her hand but she still had flinched away when he had tried to show her the meteors. Realizing he wasn't going to accomplish anything under the console he sighed and crawled back out and replaced the panel.

He set the coordinates of the Tardis and flicked the lever to send her into the vortex. He leaned over to kick a lever while pressing a button, when he noticed Rose in the corridor entrance.

"Why the Hell did I kiss you?" She asked him.

"Couldn't sleep either?" He asked her.

Ignoring his question, she sat down on the pilot seat, as she continued to rant. "I mean I can't even barely stand touching you. How could I think of kissing you?"

"I was hoping it meant you were starting to trust me and realize that I would never hurt you on purpose." He replied as he landed the Tardis and then sat down next to her. He gently placed his hand on her leg and she immediately jerked it away.

"Please don't," She told him weakly. "My nerves are in overdrive at the moment."

"That's okay." He said and headed to the doors opening them."New New York." He said happily as she looked out the door.

"Are you going to take me to every place we visited." She asked him.

"If that is what it takes." He smiled and bounced out of the doors and to the green grass by the lake. He took his coat off and spread it out before flopping down on it. She stood over him and he smiled goofily at her. She sighed and laid down next to him.

"So, the year five billion, the sun expands, the Earth gets roasted planet gone, all rocks and dust, but the human race lives on," he told her, "spread out across the stars. Soon as the Earth burns up, oh yeah, they get all nostalgic, big revival movement, but then find this place. Same size as the Earth, same air, same orbit. Lovely. Call goes out, the humans move in."

She just stared at him as he rambled on. He stopped and stared at her after his speech. "You told me that last time we were here."

"I know." He said happily. "Now off to the Hospital. Where Cassandra will not be using a psychograph on your mind."

"Or we can go find a cafe." Rose said. "And you can buy me some tea."

"Or we can go get tea." He stood and helped her to her feet before putting his coat back on. He offered her his arm and she ignored it as she headed towards the city. Sighing he followed after her.

They sat in the tiny cafe across from each other making small talk or sitting quietly staring out the cafe window, sipping their tea. Later on when they headed back to the Tardis, he reached for her hand and she let him take it. He saw a dopey tired smile on her face.

"Time for bed, I think," He told her with a smile and she nodded her agreement. They went inside the Tardis and stood in the control room outside of the corridor entrance. He decided to chance it again and leaned in and gently kissed her. She hesitated before returning the kiss. Taking a chance, he gently caressed her shoulder and pulled her closer to him. Still kissing her as he ran his hand down her back, he saw her eyes grew large and she pulled away from him breathing hard. "I can't," she gasped as she started to panic. "I'm sorry, I can't." She started to run away from him and he grabbed her hand and saw the deep fear in her eyes.

"I'm not mad." He told her softly as he let her go.

"You're not," Her voice trembled as she asked him and he shook his head no not trusting himself to speak. He watched in sadness as she she walked quickly into the corridors and out of sight, realizing he probably just ruined all of the trust he had gained.

-DW-

Running into her room she slammed the door shut and locked it as she felt herself panicking and tried to breath. She kept picturing herself being led to the platform. The last time she had truly trusted him before everything went wrong. She ran to the bathroom and threw up everything she had eaten and when her stomach was empty she continued to dry heave for awhile before pulling herself up and heading into the shower for the second time that day.


	11. Nightmares

**More than one person has called me worse than Moffitt recently. I don't know whether or not to take that as a compliment**.

* * *

The Doctor went to his bed and crawled up into it not bothering to get undressed, both of his hearts were broken. He was ready to give up on Rose and follow through with his threat of living her at the Powell Estate. He hadn't lied to her when he told her he wasn't mad. He was too heartbroken to be mad. He closed his eyes and fell into a deep uneasy sleep.

_He was chasing her across the sandy beaches in Barcelona. She was wearing a flowing white dress and was barefoot. He should have been able to catch up to her easily but she was always just out of the reach of his grasp. She ran into the ocean and started to swim out. He quickly yanked off his white shirt and went to remove his shoes and realized that he was barefoot. Running into the water until it was too deep and then swimming after her._

_As he neared her she started struggling in the water. Her head disappeared beneath the surface and he managed to grab her and pull her back up. Repulsion filled her eyes and she pushed away from him and went below the surface again. He dove under and tried to save her but she had fear in her eyes and fought off his attempts sinking lower and lower._

_He was desperate to try to save her but everytime he grabbed her arm or hand it slipped out of his. She smiled at him as she let out the last of the air she had been holding in her lungs and he watched her breath in the water. She struggled for a moment before her eyes closed and her body went still._

_"Rose," He screamed under the water releasing the precious air he had been holding. He had no choice but to go up for air. Reaching the surface he gasped for breath and looked around. He was in the middle a circle and the people were wearing long robes. "Help me, save her," he begged them._

_One of the group raised their arm and a skeletal hand with burn marks on it appeared and pointed behind him. He turned to look and saw Rose laying on the platform. He pulled himself up out of the water, which was now just little more than a fountain and headed over to her._

_As he approached he noticed her eyes were closed and she wasn't breathing. "Who did this to her," He asked the group angrily, dropping to his knees beside her._

_"You did."_

He woke up covered in sweat and shaking from head to toe. He untangled himself from his jacket and climbed out of bed. He stripped down to just his trousers, and then left his room and went to Roses. He tried to open her door and found that she had locked it. He reached for his sonic and realized it was still in his room. He went and got it. He unlocked her door and opened it slowly to reveal her sound asleep.

He watched her breathing for a few minutes, before closing the door and relocking it. Telling himself that he had been foolish and that he wasn't ready to give up on her yet. He knew more sleep was out of the question and headed to the kitchen to make breakfast instead.

-DW-

It seemed as if she had just managed to get to sleep when there was a small knock on her door. "One minute," She called out and then went to unlock the door. Opening the door she found the Doctor standing there with a tray of food. Though he was smiling, she suddenly felt worried for him.

He was still wearing just trousers and his all ready skinny frame seemed even skinnier. His hair was still a mess and the smile on his face didn't quite reach his eyes. His eyes instead were slightly sunken and looked sad as he greeted her.

"Breakfast in bed," He said in a cheerful voice.

She went and climbed back into bed and he sat the tray down on her. She looked down at the tray and saw that it had a large assortment of food on it. She reached down and picked up the fork and scooped up some of the hash browns, aware that he was still watching her. She took a tiny bite.

"It's good." She told him. He leaned over and kissed her head. The sadness in his eyes turned to shock when she took his hand in hers and then kissed it. "Thank you, for breakfast."

"You're welcome. Learned to make the hash browns from Antoine. There was a strange bloke." He rubbed the back of his neck. "When you are done, get dressed and meet me in the control room." He said as he left the room.


	12. The Singing Towers

Even though he had decided not to give up on her, he was worn in both his mind and his body. This was why he never let himself fall for his companions. Why he had never loved anyone like he had loved his wife so long ago on Gallifrey. This was his last attempt. If she rejected him still he would have to find a way to let her go. He went to the wardrobe and picked out a dress, bringing back to Rose before she had finished eating.

"Put this on," He told her laying the dress down on the bed.

"Where are we going," She asked him excitedly seeing the dress.

"You'll see," He replied as he left the room. He went back to the wardrobe and pulled down a black tuxedo. He hesitated for a moment before putting it on. He had always ran into bad luck when he wore a tuxedo and he wanted this night to be perfect. He got dressed and tied up the bowtie. Looking at himself in the mirror, he scrunched his face as he adjusted it. He ran his fingers through his hair and then headed to the control room.

Landing the Tardis he waited for Rose. He was standing with his back to the corridors when he heard her footsteps approaching and he turned to see her. His hearts seemed to catch in his throat. Rather than the dress he had picked out she was wearing a simple black dress that fell to just above her knee . The top was low coat but had lace fabric covering it. She had done her hair up in simple french braid pigtails and was wearing makeup and black high heels.

"You look beautiful." He finally managed to stammer.

"Thank you." She replied coming forward. He offered her his arm and she took it as they headed to the Tardis doors. He opened the doors and he could sense her disappointment as she saw a forest in front of them.

"Don't worry, the real surprise is further up." He whispered and lead her carefully along the path. As they reached the edge of the forest he asked her to shut her eyes and he felt her tense up.

"Please, Rose just trust me and close your eyes," He pleaded with her. She squeezed his arm gently and then closed her eyes.

"I trust you," she told him softly.

He led her out of the forest and up the side of a small hill. He removed her hand from his arm and then turned her slightly. He stepped away from her so that he could watch her reaction.

"Open them," He told her and watched as her face go from nervous to confused as she did. Spread out in the valley below were stone statues of people stretching high into the sky. Every statue looked different but all of them had their arms spread wide in front of them and their mouths slightly opened.

"Doctor," She started to say and he put his fingers to his lips. From the valley below a song was beginning to rise up to them. It started low and was gaining in volume until the noise surrounded and filled them. The melody was beautiful and haunting at the same time. The song, though having no words seemed to speak to her about heartache, pain and finally hope.

"What is this place," She asked him through the tears that were beginning to fall.

"The Singing Towers of Darillium," he replied.

"Does everyone hear the same song?

"Yes, but the song means something different to everyone who comes here." He walked up behind her and placed his hands around her waist. She tensed up immediately. "I'm not going to hurt you." He whispered in her ear, his voice sounding sad.

He held her as he felt her start to relax in his arms. He stood there holding her and breathing in her scent. To him the Towers were singing about lost loves and being so far from home. He was thankful she wasn't pushing him away again. As much as she wanted him away, he just needed to be able to have someone to hold.

She turned around slowly in his arms so that she was looking him in the eyes and he reached up and gently wiped the tears away from her cheeks as he leaned in and kissed her. She returned the kiss without hesitation. Then pulled back and rested her head on his shoulder as he wrapped his arms around her and began to rock slowly to the music.

He kissed the top of her head. "I've missed you." He told her softly.

"I've been right here Doctor."

He shook his head, knowing she couldn't see him. The Towers sung on and they held on to each other as the tune changed from sorrow forgiveness.


	13. Bad Wolf Bay

Later, back on the Tardis, they sat together eating dinner. They had stayed watching the Towers sing, until as dawn broke the horizon, the song had ended.

"What made you change your mind." He asked casually.

"I didn't, I still don't trust you."

He glared at her. "Then what was that?"

"Me forgiving you." She replied and he sat there and stared at her waiting for her to continue.

"After it happened you seemed okay with it. Even though you said it hurt you, I didn't think it had." She said not looking at him. "I wanted to hurt you and make you feel as bad as I did. It was only when you brought me breakfast that I realized you all ready did."

He wanted to say those three little words he knew would make it all right, but instead he took her hand and rubbed the back of it with his thumb. She smiled at him and he felt his hearts race.

-DW-

Fate was against them and it had been since the beginning. He lay curled up on his bed sobbing harder than he had in a long time. Rose was gone. He had searched desperately for a way to pull her back to him but at least he had got to tell her goodbye. Then Donna had been a distraction for a short time but she hadn't wanted to go with him and he didn't blame her.

He had tried and failed to tell her how he felt again but the gap closed before he had the chance and now she would never know how he felt about her.

-DW-

_2 years Later:_

He stood on the beach beside her. Across from him stood the Metacrisis who had grown from his hand. After everything they had been through together it had come down to this. There couldn't be two Doctors in the universe. He didn't think the universe could survive it. Rose stood between them looking confused as he was handed a piece of the Tardis and Donna explained how to accelerate it's growth so rather having to wait thousands of years they would only have to wait a few.

"But he's not you." Rose said nearly in tears.

"He needs you. That's very me."

"But it's better than that, though. Don't you see what he's trying to give you? Tell her. Go on." Donna encouraged them.

"I look like him and I think like him. Same memories, same thoughts, same everything. Except I've only got one heart."

"Which means?" Rose asked still confused.

"I'm part human. Specifically, the aging part. I'll grow old and never regenerate. I've only got one life, Rose Tyler. I could spend it with you, if you want."

"You'll grow old at the same time as me?" She want to know.

"Together."

"We've got to go. This reality is sealing itself off for ever."

"But, it's still not right, because the Doctor's still you." Rose insisted.

"And I'm him."

"All right. Both of you, answer me this. When I last stood on this beach, on the worst day of my life, what was the last thing you said to me?" She asked looking at him. "Go on, say it." She said turning to look at the other.

"I said, Rose Tyler."

"Yeah, and how was that sentence going to end?" She demanded to know.

"Does it need saying?"

"And you, Doctor? What was the end of that sentence?" She asked turning to him. He leaned forward and whispered the three words he had been longing to say into her ear.

"I love you." As soon as the words were out of his mouth she grabbed him by the collar and pressed her lips to his. He opened his mouth and kissed her back passionately. As the sound of the Tardis dematerializing filled the air, she broke the kiss and ran towards it. He walked up beside her and took her hand as it disappeared for the last time from the beach. She looked at him and then pulled her hand away.

"If you have all his memories, then you should know I didn't trust him." She said angrily. "I didn't trust him for the longest time and I tried and he has left me here again. I am sorry but you aren't him."

He stepped forward without saying a word and took her hands and put them on his chest. He saw her eyes grow wide as she realized she was feeling two heart beats.

* * *

_Still more to come!_


	14. First night

_I am overwhelmed by the response this story has gotten. Thank you to all my readers and I appreciate the continued reviews. _

* * *

Rose stared at him stunned for several minutes before wrapping her arms around him again, pulling him into a deep kiss. She kissed him passionately for several moments before finally pulling back and then hitting him.

"Ow, what was that for," He asked rubbing his arm.

"You stupid, stupid man. Do you realize what you have done?"

"I do."

"The other universe needs the Doctor."

"And they have him for a short time. He may not be able to regenerate and he may be a little more reckless but he will learn and Donna will help him." He told her and wrapped her in a hug. She relaxed her head against him. "Besides I don't want to have that lonely life anymore. I would rather spend one life here with you then have a thousand being lonely."

"But what about the stars." She asked her voice muffled against his chest.

"I have a piece of the Tardis and with Donna's idea, I could have a new Tardis grown in," He paused for a moment. "About five years. Blimey that is a long time."

"I am sure Dad can give you a job at Torchwood and you'll have to get a mortgage." She sang to him pulling away laughing.

"Well you two, I sorted it out while you have been standing here doing nothing. You're dad is sending a dirigible down." Jackie said. "I suppose you need somewhere to stay two being he just left us here again."

"Mom that's the Doctor."

"Don't be stupid."

"It's true. We switched clothes." He said happily as Jackie stared at him in disbelief.

-DW-

That night as he lay in bed staring at the ceiling, he regretted his hasty decision to stay behind. He was restless and without the Tardis he was also stuck. Rose had gone to her room and had left him alone in the guest room. She had barely spoke to him since they had stood on the beach and she realized who he was. He heard his door open and he looked over to see Rose standing in the doorway. His eyes grew wide as he saw from the light shining in from the hallway she was wearing a short little black dress that he was pretty sure was see through. She closed the door behind her and crawled up onto his bed as she approached, he could smell the whiskey on her.

"I've missed you," She whispered softly and then nibbled on his earlobe.

"Rose," He said warningly. "Stop it."

"Didn't you miss me," She whined and moved to kiss his neck.

"Of course I did, but that isn't the point." He groaned as she ran her hand across his stomach. She moved her hand lower and he felt her hand on his groin but he grabbed her wrist and pulled it back up. "Rose I haven't been able to earn back your trust, since you have been gone. I am not going to lose it all again by taking advantage of you."

"You wouldn't be taking advantage of me if I want it." She giggled.

"You're drunk," He replied.

"No, I'm not," she whined and tried to kiss him but he turned his head away. She slapped his chest hard making him wince. "Fine, I guess it is only fun for you when people are watching and I'm not willing." She stood up and started to leave the room but he was still holding her wrist.

"Let go of me," She hissed at him.

"No, come here." He said softly.

"You lost your chance."

"I know but come here," He gently pulled her back onto the bed and tucked her under the blankets before he laid back down on top of them. He gently pushed her so she turned and faced away from him and he cuddled up behind her and pressed his body to hers.

She sighed and closed her eyes and within a few moments she was asleep. Not wanting to be there when she woke up, and have her assume the worse again, he dislodged himself from her and headed down to the kitchen. He saw an almost empty bottle of whiskey sitting on the counter and wondered how much of that she had drank tonight. He had a brief flashback of her stumbling into the control room to yell at him after everything had gone wrong. He held the bottle in his hands and considered taking a drink himself, before pouring it down the drain and throwing the bottle away.


	15. Realizations

When she came downstairs in the morning the table was covered in paperwork in his circular handwriting. He heard her come into the kitchen and looked up and smiled at her.

"Morning," He said cheerfully as he reached over and grabbed one of the papers and crossed out a section.

"Morning," She replied. "Thank you for not listening to me last night."

"You're welcome, and about that." He took his glasses off and leaned back in his chair as she sat down across from him with a cup of coffee. "You are welcome to come into my room anytime you want to Rose, you can stay however long you want and go as far as you feel comfortable. I won't push you or force you to go any further then you are willing. But you come into my room drunk, I can guarantee you that I will only stay long enough to make sure you are asleep and then you will wake up alone."

"I'll hold you to that," She smiled at him with her tongue sticking slightly out.

"Have you told anyone what happened?" He asked her seriously.

"No."

"I thought not, you should have talked to somebody Rose."

"Oh yeah and tell them the man I am trying to get back to forced me. That would have gone over well."

"What was that?" Pete said coming into the kitchen.

"N-Nothing," Rose stammered.

"No, I heard what you said. You said he forced you." Pete replied angrily.

"It was a misunderstanding Daddy, I swear. He told me he was going to and I didn't believe him."

"And you just made things worse," He said quietly. "Rose, I think me and your dad should talk alone, okay?"

"All right, I'll just go and get ready for work." She stood up and hurried out of the room.

Pete sat in her vacated spot and stared him straight in the eye. "Explain, because I am not a violent man Doctor but right now I could kill you and not think twice about it. In fact from what Rose tells me, I would be able to kill you several times."

"You know Rose was traveling with me," he began and Pete nodded. "I took her to this beautiful planet. I meant to get there at the actual harvest festival, I swear I didn't go to the spring festival on purpose. The Harvest festival is a lot more fun, there are games and always a lot of exotic fruits to try. They grow food for most of the planets in their system."

"You're rambling," Pete interrupted him.

"As soon as we landed on the planet and stepped off the Tardis. They chose us to participate in their rituals. Every year they choose two off worlders to consummate to celebrate the upcoming harvest and if the two refuse then their blood is spilled to preserve the harvest instead. We couldn't leave because we were being guarded, and I couldn't let her die."

Pete just stared at him as though he were trying to figure out whether or not he believed him.

"I tried to explain what they wanted us to do. She just didn't believe me. I swear I wouldn't have otherwise."

"I believe you, this time." Pete said finally. "But I can guarantee you if I hear it has happened again, I won't hesitate to kill you."

"I would let you." He muttered. He leaned forward and grabbed one of the papers on the table and scratched out part of it.

"So what is all this," Pete asked gesturing at the table. "Jackie will be down soon with Tony for breakfast and won't be happy the table is covered."

"I'll clean it up. I was just trying to figure out how to accelerate the growth of the Tardis without damaging her integrity. Donna's idea will work to speed it up, but the first time we go out, she'll destroy the earth, if I don't fix this." He picked up all the papers and stacked them neatly in front of him.

Jackie came into the room and saw them staring at each other. "What's this all about. You two fighting all ready. I told you to be nice Pete." She chuckled.

"We were just discussing the Doctor coming to work for me at Torchwood."

"Were we." He asked surprised.

"You're going to be here for awhile. You are going to need a job. You can stay here for as long as you would like but if you want anything you are going to need money to buy it."

"You want me to work for you?"

"It will be fun," Rose said coming back into the kitchen. She was wearing black jeans and a light blue blouse with combat boots. She had pulled her blond hair back into a loose ponytail. He stared at her open mouthed for a moment before pulling himself together.

"You work for Torchwood too?" He asked her.

"Yep." She replied," Come on at least give it a try before just saying no."

He just nodded at her as the full weight of his decision came crashing down. He was going to be domestic.


	16. The Doctor's depression

The next few weeks became routine with him working at the last place he ever thought he would, Torchwood. Though he was given several projects to work on and to keep him busy he was becoming bored and even worse depressed. His free hours he spent away from Torchwood in the basement of the Tyler home. Pete had converted part of it into an office and living area for him and his work covered the space and the desk, while the Tardis grew happily in the corner. He had figured out the missing piece of the equation to make her safe.

Rose came down almost every night to visit with him but the only time she stayed she was drunk. True to his word he would make sure she was asleep either in his bed or on the couch, before continuing to work the night away. Whether she noticed that he rambled less or that his skinny frame was now almost skeletal, he didn't know. He barely noticed it himself, he ate when he remember and when he slept it was only to dream of what he had left behind and wake up in cold sweats.

As he sat and sipped his tea, watching Rose sleep on his couch, he regretted his hasty decision to stay here. He felt trapped and he was no closer to her then he had been two years ago. He could feel the world turning beneath his feet and slipping away from him as he desperately tried to cling to it. For the first time since she had left him, he felt tears streaming down his face. He sat the tea down on the table and pulled his knees up to his chest and buried his face as the sobs wracked his body.

"Doctor," He heard Rose say softly. He quickly straightened himself out and wiped his face. "What's wrong?" She asked him concerned.

"N-nothing," He stammered and quickly stood up and headed into the office.

"Doctor, tell me what's wrong?" She said following him.

"Don't worry about it," He replied coldly with his back turned to her, he felt her place his hand on him and surprised himself by flinching away from her touch. He heard her leave the room and he ran his hand over his desk throwing all the paperwork to the floor before he picked up the lamp and threw it against the wall, watching it shatter. He sunk to the floor and for the second time in that short period he found himself crying. He wanted his life back and at that moment he felt more lonely than ever but that was okay, because he wanted to be alone.

He didn't know how much time had passed until he heard the door opening again, he could have easily figured it out if he cared. He at one point had moved from the floor by the desk, to his bed, leaving the mess behind, since then he had barely moved and had mainly laid on his back staring at the ceiling. He had always felt restless if he stayed in one place too long and now he didn't care if he ever moved again.

"Are you all right dearie?" He heard Jackie ask him.

Surprised he lifted his head to look at her as she sat down on the corner of his bed and stroked his hair. "You're going to be needing a haircut soon," She commented not waiting for him to reply to her original question. "You also need some new suits, do you always wear the same one? Pete says he pays you,so there are no excuses. We should head down to the shops later today. You can buy me lunch as a thank you."

"I don't feel like it, Jackie." He replied.

"Course you don't, but that wasn't a request. You have been down here sulking for three days now. About time you got some sunlight. Now come on get up."

"I haven't been sulking," He told her slightly insulted.

"Course you have," She responded as she stood up to leave. "Also clean that glass up before you come up stairs."

Shaking his head but not arguing he headed into the bathroom to shower. He looked at himself in the mirror and saw that his eyes looked sunken and he had a substantial amount of facial hair. He showered and shaved before cleaning up the glass and heading upstairs. Jackie had laid out a cup of tea and a bowl of oatmeal.

"That's better," She said as he entered the room. "Now you eat and then we'll leave." She motioned to the food.

"I'm not hungry."

"I didn't ask if you were, now eat."

He stood there and stared at her and she crossed her arms and waited. He smiled softly for the first time in days as he sat down at the table and took a sip of the tea.

"This could use a banana." He commented as he started on the oatmeal.

"Don't push your luck," She laughed as she handed him one. "Now hurry up and eat so we can go."

"Thank you." He said feeling better than he had in days as they came home later that night with new suits and his hair freshly cut. He had also bought a present for Rose and a necklace for Jackie, that she had insisted she didn't need but had pointed out to him no less than ten times as they browsed the shop.

He headed down to his rooms and saw Rose there waiting for him. He sat down his bags off to the side as she walked over to him and put her arms around him pulling him tightly to her. He wrapped his arms around her and kissed the top of her head.

"I'm sorry." She mumbled in his chest and then lifted her head and pressed her lips against his. He returned the kiss as her hands drifted down his back and then around to his front. She unbuttoned his shirt and releasing the kiss, helped him take it off. She gently reached out and stroked his ribs and he snickered softly.

"What?"

"Tickles," He responded as she pressed herself back to him. He rubbed her back and she sighed against him and started to shake softly. He held her tighter. "What's wrong?"

"Can I stay with you tonight?" She asked him.

"Rose if you're not ready, you don't have to do anything, just because I am upset."

"I know, I just need you to hold me."

"Now that I can do." He replied and led her to the bed. He took off his shoes as she slipped under the covers. He started to lay on top of them but then changed his mind and laid under them with her. She turned her back to him and he snuggled up against her and wrapped his body around hers. As her breathing evened out he found his eyes closing as well and that night he slept soundless for the first time in years.


	17. Rose's side

She had left the room when the Doctor had flinched from her touch. He had been being so kind and patient with her since he had come to Pete's world and all she had done is continue to hurt him. She leaned against the door frame and watched him sink to the floor his body shaking with the sobs that filled the room. He curled into the fetal position and hid his head in his arms. As his shirt lifted she saw how skinny he was becoming and wondered when the last time he ate was. She closed the door softly behind her as she left not wanting to disturb him.

Three days later as she sat in the kitchen drinking her morning coffee she realized she hadn't seen him since she had left him on the ground. She had thought she would see him coming up for work but as Pete left to go warm the car, he still wasn't in sight. She slowly crept down the stairs and looked into his room to see him laying on his bed staring at the ceiling, unaware of his surroundings and that scared her. She crept quietly back up the stairs and was thankful to see her mom in the kitchen.

"Mum, I think the Doctor is depressed, can you talk to him."

"Why can't you do it sweetie?"

"Cause I am the one who hurt him," She admitted looking down at the floor

"Then you should be the one to apologize." Jackie said sitting down at the table.

"Mum, please. He doesn't want me too."

"Don't be daft, of course he does. Now I will get him out of bed, but you have to talk to him. I've seen the way you have been avoiding him, and if you don't want to be with him, you have to let him know. I raised you better than this Rose Tyler."

The car horn filled the air. "I will mum, I promise, after work I will talk to him." She grabbed her coat and rushed out the door. All day at work she could barely concentrate. She was suppose to be finishing reports on the recent rift activity but instead all her thoughts were on the Doctor. Her mum was right it was best to let him go if she didn't want to be with him. But the thought of not seeing him and him going on without her, hurt her heart. She knew she was being selfish. She was so afraid of him touching her that she would take a sip of whiskey, just to make it seem like she had been drinking, so that she would have the courage to sleep in his room. And not once had he tried anything. He would just look at her with those disappointed eyes and help her lay down and wait for her to drift off to sleep.

After work she headed home and straight down into his room to talk to him but he wasn't there. She sat down and waited for his return, she was nervous but she was going to do what was right so that he could move on. As he entered the room she walked over to him and put her arms around him pulling him tightly to her. She felt his arms wrap around her and he kissed the top of her head

"I'm sorry." She mumbled in his chest. She couldn't do it, as she lifted her head to look him in the eye and tell him how she felt, she instead found herself with her lips pressed against his. He returned the kiss, making her legs feel weak and she ran her hands down his back and around to the front. She felt how skinny he was but she had to see it. She unbuttoned his shirt and releasing the kiss, helped him take it off. She gently reached out and stroked his ribs and he snickered softly.

"What?"

"Tickles," He responded and she pressed herself back to him. He rubbed her back and she sighed against him and started to shake as she fought of the feelings of fear that she had hurt him worse than he had ever hurt her. He held her tighter. "What's wrong?"

"Can I stay with you tonight?" She asked him not wanting to be alone.

"Rose if you're not ready, you don't have to do anything, just because I am upset." He replied softly.

"I know, I just need you to hold me." She told him.

"Now that I can do." He replied and led her to the bed. She slipped under the covers and waited for him as he took of his shoes and climbed into bed. He slid under the covers and she rolled over to face the wall. He pressed his body against hers and wrapped his arm around her waist holding her close to him. She lay there relaxing and felt her breath even out as he fell asleep. She turned her head slightly to make sure he was asleep before letting the tears that had been fighting to get out, fall from her eyes.

* * *

_Continued Reviews are appreciated. _


	18. A day off

She woke up early the next morning and was surprised to see that he was still asleep beside her. He was laying on his back, mumbling slightly in his sleep and seemed distressed. She rolled over and gently stroked his hair.

"It's okay calm down," She said softly.

"Rose," He whimpered.

"Hey sleepyhead. Time to get up and get ready for work." She smiled.

"I don't have to, the boss gave me the day off." He said as he turned over to towards her and snuggled down deeper into the blankets and proceeded to hide his face.

"Really did you run that past him."

He lifted his head just enough so she could see his eyes as he pouted at her.

"Oh, all right. I'll let him know" She laughed.

His eyes drifted closed again and within moments he was asleep again. She carefully climbed out of bed and headed upstairs to get breakfast. Pete was in the kitchen sipping coffee when she entered.

"Morning Daddy," She said cheerfully and kissed him on the head. "The Doctor is taking another sick day."

"Is he okay?"

"Just tired I think." She replied. She took a shower and ate before pouring two cups of tea and then headed back downstairs.

-DW-

He awoke again as Rose came back down the stairs. He sat up in bed and took the tea from her as she climbed back into bed and leaned against him. He wrapped his arm around her and held her close as they sat quietly for awhile enjoying each other's company. He was actually thankful she had listened to him and didn't try anything last night. He didn't know whether or not he would have been able to go through with it. She had once told him that she had wanted to hurt him but realized how hurt he actually was, but she never knew the full extent of it. He needed to touch her and be close to her. It had been that way since he had regenerated, but the thought of going further terrified him in a way he didn't think was possible. That was part of the reason he had given her complete control. If the control was in her hands, he couldn't be afraid that he had pushed her to far, too soon.

"Did I ever tell you, I was thinking of you when I regenerated." He asked as he rubbed her back gently.

"No," She said softly and sat her tea down before turning over to bury her face against his chest.

"I was. I wanted to be someone that you could be happy with and love."

"I loved you with the big ears." She mumbled.

"After what happened, you tried to hurt me and I tried to push you away while at the same time trying to hold on to you tighter than I ever had before. That is why I wanted you to tell Jackie. I knew she wouldn't let you come with me anymore." He admitted. "Then you were gone, if it hadn't been for Martha, I don't know what I would have done. She made me talk to her. Then I drove her away."

"How did you drive her away?"

"It doesn't matter right now."

She nodded in acceptance "She must have done you a world of good before that though, you never were this open. "

"Oh, she did, she fancied me." He chuckled as she playfully slapped him. "But part of talking to you was your mum's idea. She told me on some planets it is how people communicate."

"Does mum know?" She asked concerned.

"Not unless you told her. Anyway, after she left, Donna came with me and was one of the best friends I ever had and made me feel alive again. Oh she was brilliant. But even after all we did, I saw you and I only wanted to make things right."

"But Rose, lying to each other isn't going to make it right and you pretending to be drunk, doesn't help things either."

"You knew?" She asked as she felt her face growing hot.

He kissed the top of her head. "I really hoped you would get over it, but if it made you feel safe." He shrugged.

"I can't believe the whole time you knew." She sounded indignant. "So where do we go from here?"

"I don't know. But I would like to try to find out. I meant what I said on the beach about wanting to spend your life with you."

"I would like that, but first lets try dating and see where it goes."

"Dating?"

"Yeah, it is what humans do to get to know people." He sat his tea down finally and wrapped his other arm around her, laying his head down on top of her head. As he breathed in her scent he wondered again what he had gotten himself into.


	19. Lost Hope

It was over a month before she tried anything. He awoke one morning as she was tying his hands to the headboard.

"What are you doing?" He chuckled at her.

"Tying you up." She replied.

He rolled his eyes at her. "I can see this and certainly feel it. But why?"

She smiled and stuck her tongue between her teeth at him. He easily slipped his wrist out through her hastily tied knots. She was trying to be gentle and had left way too much slack in the rope. He sat up and pulled her close to him running his hand down her back. She moaned into him. He moved his hands up to her hair and stroked it as he laid her back on the bed.

Leaving their clothes on he laid down on top of her and slowly put his mouth to hers. She returned the kiss hungrily before he released it and moved his mouth down to taste her neck. He lifted his head and she was staring at him. Her breathing was shaky.

"Are you okay," He asked softly, as he brushed back her hair again and she just nodded. "Are you sure, Rose?"

"Yes."

"Do you want to go further?"

"Not right now." she admitted and he leaned forward and kissed her again.

-DW-

"So when are you two going to get married and give me grandchildren." Jackie asked them the next morning cheekily.

He choked on his tea and Rose thumped him on the back. "Mum," She scolded her, "We are just getting to know each other again, we aren't thinking about marriage, let alone children."

"But maybe we should." He spoke up, his voice barely above a whisper.

"There is plenty of time for that later," Her attention was turned to him now.

"Because we need to, do you want children Rose?"

"One day in the future." She stated.

He nodded without saying anything and took another sip of his tea. "What about you Doctor," She asked him.

"I've been a father before," He admitted.

"What?"

"It was a long time ago."

"What about now, do you want kids again?"

"We should really discuss this later," He suddenly agreed with her and then looked towards, Jackie who was pretending to be more interested in the newspaper.

"Why, can't you just tell me, Yes or no?"

"Rose, please not right now?"

"Don't do this to me Doctor," She said firmly. "You started the conversation now answer me, do you want to have kids with me."

"No"

"Why not?" This time she sounded sad and it broke his hearts.

"Because we can't have kids Rose," He stated sadly stroking her cheek. "It is biologically almost impossible. If on the low chance you do conceive it is even less likely you will be able to bring the baby to term. If somehow you do, and they are Time Lords, even part Time Lord, they could have all sorts of problems including making too much energy and burning out, or not making the energy that they need. Both of which can and will kill them."

"How low is the chance I could get pregnant?"

"About 5% and it is only an 3% chance that if you do that you can carry the baby to term, or at least long enough to give birth safely."

"Why didn't you tell me before?" She sounded angry now.

"I wanted to see if there was actually a chance we could make it work before I brought it up." He went to touch her and she flinched away from him before standing up to leave the room.

"We are not starting this again." He said angrily as he grabbed her wrist. She swung around quickly and with her free hand slapped him hard across the face.

"Let me go," she hissed.

"No." He said firmly. She brought her hand around to hit him again and he grabbed that wrist as well and was now holding them both firmly. "Talk to me."

"You're hurting me." She cried out.

"Only because you won't relax. If you would just relax it wouldn't hurt. Now Rose just talk to me." He pleaded.

"Doctor if you ever loved me, then you will let me go." She cried.

"It is because I love you, that I can't."

"Doctor," Jackie said warily, speaking up for the first time since the argument started. "You need to let her go and Rose you need to calm down and talk to him. Whatever is going on between you two is getting wearisome." She stood and left the room as they both watched her. He wondered briefly when Jackie had become the voice of reason.

He looked at his hands still firmly wrapped around Rose's wrist and then to her face and saw the tears streaming down her cheeks and the fear in her eyes. She had stopped trying to pull away from him. He released her wrist feeling ashamed of himself and expected her to run away, so he was more surprised when she sat down next to him. She looked worn out and when he tried to put his hand on her again, this time she let him.

"I'm sorry, I flinched away."

"I'm sorry, I didn't tell you sooner."

"No, you were right. There was no need. We can't even have sex, how can we have children." She took his hand and kissed it. "I don't suppose you would consider adoption." He just shook his head. "I didn't think so. So where do we go from here."

"I don't know," He replied not looking at her.


	20. The right thing

He stayed hidden in his rooms and got lost in his work. It was easy for him to do. Pete allowed him to work from home as much as he wanted as long as he got the occasional update on his progress. Along with his Torchwood work the Tardis was still growing and he gave it a lot more attention than normally would be required. He would talk to her as he was doing his work and listen to the low hum from the baby Tardis as she was developing. After the argument in the kitchen, they had taken to the unhealthy path of avoiding each other rather than talking about what happened.

He was tried emotionally on the inside from dealing with her and it and everything else. He just wanted to go home. Back to the Tardis, to the universe that he knew. He wanted to run all the way back to Gallifrey and fall at the feet of his mother and beg her for her forgiveness. But that orange sky that he had loved so much was gone, even if he did find a way back. His mother only existed in his memories now along with his family, his children and his beloved Susan. There was no point in wishing. He picked up one of the bottles of wine that had been his companion the last few days and took another drink.

-DW-

Rose headed down the stairs to check on him. She had been avoiding him since the incident in the kitchen. She couldn't do it anymore. It was time she took her mother's advice and do what she should have done in the beginning and give him a chance to be happy. They were fighting a losing battle trying to make it work between the two of them. She knew he had stayed in this universe for her, but she doubted he knew how much of a toll it was going to be on them.

She knocked gently on his door and receiving no reply she pushed open the door and went inside. "Hello," she called out. She was surprised by the state of his room. He had never been tidy, with his work strewn about the areas he frequented most, but this was horrible. Wine bottles were scattered about. He had tipped his chairs and table over and papers were everywhere. She found him in his office with his head down on his desk. He was sound asleep, though he also might have been passed out, she wasn't sure.

"And you complain to me drinking doesn't help." She shook her head. "Hypocrite." she teased him and he groaned. "Oh waking up are you?" She asked and he smacked his lips as he turned his head and began to softly snore. "Nope guess not." She sighed and began to clean his room.

-DW-

He awoke with his head pounding. He sat up and rubbed his face with his hands. He leaned back in his chair and that is when he noticed the bottles of wine were gone. He stood up and looked around to see that the rooms had been cleaned and the table and chairs had been placed back where they belong. His papers were picked up off the floor and stacked neatly on one end of the table. At the other end, Rose sat watching him.

"How long have you been down here," He asked casually.

"Long enough to realize you are a slob." She responded.

"I am guessing this isn't just a social call." He said seeing the look on her face.

"No, and no point in avoiding it anymore." She took a deep breath. "I don't think this is going to work."

"I know. You want a family and all the things I can't give you. I can't even give you the stars anymore."

"I'm sorry. I wanted it too. I really did." Tears streamed down her cheeks and he resisted the urge to wipe them away. She stood up and headed up the stairs. He made no move to stop her. As soon as the door closed behind her, he let his own tears free.

-DW-

"What has happened now," Jackie came storming into his room. He was laying on the floor with his feet on the couch staring at the ceiling again. "I swear I can't leave you two alone for a moment without something happening. Rose can't stop crying again."

"We are calling it quits Jackie."

"Oh don't be stupid." Jackie said and then sat down on the couch next to his feet and squeezed his ankle. "You going to be okay, sweetie."

"Hmmm, yeah," he responded half heartedly. "I'm always all right."

* * *

_Now before I get hate mail and people yelling at me. I swear there are more chapters coming. _


	21. A new hope

He couldn't stand to live at the mansion anymore, so he moved into a small one bedroom flat, that made him feel claustrophobic. Jackie was over almost daily checking up on him. She made sure that he had food in his kitchen and that his flat was clean and that he was taking care of himself. She had become almost like a mother to him which amused him greatly since she had hated him when they first met. She talked of Rose and how Rose was working and getting back on her feet. He listened but hardly ever responded. He had waited two years years to get back to her and then they had tried and failed to make it work for almost 6 months after that. Now another five months had passed and though he could feel the earth turning he found it hard to believe he had been there almost a year now.

It was after midnight when his phone rang. Curious he looked at it for a second before answering it. "Hello?"

"Oh, God Doctor, Rose was in a car accident." Jackie said frantically over the line and he felt himself turning pale.

"Is she okay."

"I don't know they won't tell me anything. They are taking her to Royal Hope Hospital. Do you know where that is?"

"Yep. I'll meet you there."

"Thank you." And the line went dead. He quickly dressed and ran out the door to his car. He got in and drove to the hospital. Parking he got out and ran inside.

"Rose Tyler, She was in a car accident." He told the receptionist. He was given her room number and he rushed up the stairs and down the hall to where her room was. Knocking softly he opened the door to see Jackie sitting by her bed and Rose sound asleep. At least he hoped she was asleep. Her leg was propped up in a cast and she had a bandage on her head. An IV was hooked to her arm and she was hooked to monitors.

"Jackie," He exclaimed and ran over to her and hugged her. "How's Rose?"

"She's resting. Come on in." She whispered. He went in and pulled out his glasses and looked at her charts and the monitor. Aside from the broken leg and the cut to her head she was okay. He breathed a sigh of relief before settling into the free chair and taking her hand.

"I'm so sorry." He whispered.

"It's not your fault." Jackie replied. "According to the police, her car slid on some ice and she hit a tree. It was about an hour before someone saw the car and called for help."

"She was alone." He asked horrified.

"I'm okay," Rose replied softly and squeezed his hand.

"But you were alone and Rose you should have never had to be alone." He kissed her on the head and she moved over slightly and patted the bed. He climbed up onto and laid down next to her just holding her in his arms.

-DW-

He played with the bowtie. He hated bowties, but she had wanted him to wear one. It had been a tough year. After the car accident, she had to go through rehabilitation to get walking again and she still struggled with a brace on it. Her leg had been shattered in three places and she would more than likely always have a limp now. He had stood by her side through the whole thing. He felt guilty that he hadn't been there when she was injured but he could be there for her now.

He still remembered the look on her face as they had walked along the boardwalk on the beach, holding hands. He was nervous and as the sun set she found out why. He got down on one knee in front of her and took her hand.

"Rose, I have made mistakes in the past. I have hurt you and left you alone when you needed me the most. Now if you let me I will spend the rest of my life making it right." He reached into his pocket and pulled out a small box, in it was a gold band with a little diamond on top.

"Yes, oh yes." She said happily. Now he was standing in front of the church waiting. He looked out at the small group of people that had gathered for the wedding. Jackie was out of sight, helping Rose get ready. As the music started Jackie rushed in and sat down. Tony came down the aisle first carrying the rings and rushed to stand by his mother.

As the music changed she came around the corner her arm linked with Pete's. She had chosen a light blue low cut dress that flowed down into a long skirt. She had her hair up in curls that fell around her face. His hearts skipped a beat as she approached him. Pete kissed her on the cheek and then gave her arm to the Doctor's before going to stand with his wife.

He tried to pay attention to what the pastor was saying but he found himself staring at Rose. He repeated his vows and then took the ring and slipped it on her finger. She did the same to him.

"I do." She said.

"Then I now pronounce you man and wife. You may kiss the bride."

He leaned forward and gently brushed his lips on hers, teasing her, before pressing his mouth firmly to hers.


	22. Healing

_Warning the first part of the chapter contains a sex scene. If that isn't your thing skip down to the first marker. I tried not to make it too graphic as it is more about a wound being healed then the actual act. _

* * *

They danced the night away. He had always prefered the wedding reception to the actual wedding and had on more than one occasion shown up as the dancing started. But to his own weddings he was always present. Jackie and Pete had got them a room in a hotel for the night and in the morning they were to be on a plane to New Zealand for the next five days.

Rose had kissed him and then gone to shower while he waited for her on the bed. He knew the human tradition of consummating the marriage, but at the same time he was dreading it. They had made their relationship work the last year by not trying anything more than kissing and holding each other. As she stepped out of the bathroom, he felt himself stir as he saw her wearing a little red nightie.

"You like it." she smirked.

"I do," He managed to stutter out. She came up onto the bed and crawled up across him, locking her lips onto his. He ran his hand down her back and placed it on her bottom, gasping as he felt her bare skin. She moaned at his touch and suddenly his suit was too restricting and he needed to get it off. He quickly undid the buttons not daring to release the kiss as he shook the coat and the jacket off. She pulled up his undershirt and he released the kiss momentarily as she pulled it over his head.

He turned her over and laid on top of before kissing her neck and down her chest. She sat up and he helped her pull the nightie off before before undoing his own pants and slipping them off. He paused above her as he continued to kiss her. His mind started to drift to her laying beneath him on the platform and he pushed it away as he rolled off and layed on his back.

"Is something wrong," She asked him, her voice full of concern.

"Come here," He said as seductively as he could. He helped her climb on top of him and straddle him. He pulled her down to him and then held he hips in place as he gently started to move against her. She was shaking gently in his arms.

"Are you okay," He whispered and he felt her nod against his chest. Lifting his hips so he had a better angle he gently started to push himself inside her and she moaned. "Am I hurting you."

"No," She replied. Keeping his movements slow and shallow he held her tightly to him. She whispered his name in his ear as she let go and gave in as their bodies united as one.

-DW-

The Tardis grew and grew until one day it was ready. He excitedly held Rose's hand as he stepped through the doors. "Oh you are beautiful." He exclaimed as they stepped inside. The Tardis had outdone herself. While she still had the Coral patterns she had a sleek new glass floor with steps leading down. He ceilings were taller than before and gave the impression that they rounded out at the top. The pilot seat was now a sleek black when the center console held new buttons and levers.

"Where do you want to go," He asked Rose, as he ran around the Tardis setting the coordinates. He hadn't seen this universe yet and was dying to find out what was different and what had remained the same. He hoped somewhere out there was Barcelona, so he could hear her laugh again at the dogs with no noses.

-DW-

He had told her it was almost impossible for her to get pregnant. But as her belly grew there was no denying that she was. They hid it from everyone as she took to wearing baggier clothes out in public. He had warned her that she could miscarry at anytime and she took him seriously. She was emotionally attached to the baby from the start but they went about their days as though the thing growing in her stomach didn't exist. There was no nursery set up and no talk of getting cribs. They discussed work and made plans to go on vacation, or just traveled around in the Tardis with no destination in mind.

After the sixth month passed and the pregnancy held she was beginning to get excited. The baby would be able to live, even if it meant medical help. She was picking out fabrics and planning a nursery. She ran names by him and he listened and commented but his original fears held. What if there was something wrong? He knew better than most the problems that a half human baby could have. He never had told Rose or anyone else that he had impregnated a previous companion. They had gone through the same dread that she might miscarry before she carried the baby to term and he had dared get his hopes up. His beautiful little son hadn't lived a month as his body fought a losing battle to contain the Time Lord energy it didn't need. He had tried to take it off of him but nothing helped.

When Rose was into labor it was one of the happiest and scariest days he had in a long time. She managed to carry the baby to the end of the seventh month before the child decided it wanted out. He took her to the best hospital he knew of in the new universe and held her hand as she delivered a daughter. He examined her closely looking for anything that might be wrong and as the days turned into weeks and the weeks into months, he held her knowing that Rose had once again done the impossible.

But with the birth of their child the daily trips in the Tardis stopped. Traveling all space and time was no way to raise a child and so he settled back into the domestic life of Torchwood. He still used the Tardis for the occasional family trip into space and time and to help Torchwood out but his days of running were done.


	23. Endings

The years flew by quicker than he would have liked. He stayed by Rose's side as her hair turned gray and she slowed down. They traveled until she couldn't anymore and then once more he parked the Tardis. Rather than returning to work he spent his days taking care of her as she slipped further and further away from him.

She was hardly aware he was in the room anymore but he still talked to her constantly and told her all about his life. Then one evening he entered the room to find her staring at the door. "I want to go home," she cried and he held her long after she fell asleep. He was still holding her as she took her last breath.

He burned her body in the traditions of Gallifrey, and gave her body back to the earth and the air. He stood at the fireside holding their daughter. She hadn't stopped crying while his face held all of the grief but none of the tears. As the fire burned out he heard a noise unlike he had heard in years. Turning he saw the Metacrisis stepping out of his Tardis.

"You don't belong here," He said turning back towards the fire.

"Neither do you." The metacrisis responded hobbling over. "It's time you returned home. That universe still needs the Doctor."

He argued and argued but in the end it was useless. He knew he was right and so kissing his daughter goodbye, he returned to the universe he had left behind. She would have returned with him had he asked but they both knew he never would. When he returned he was angry and the anger flowed out of him as he declared himself the Time Lord Victorious, costing someone their life. And in the end costing him his own.

He fought the regeneration for as long as he could, he didn't want to lose the body that Rose had loved and that had loved her in return. As his life was coming to a close he said goodbye to all of his former companions before landing in front of the Powell Estate. He had to see her one last time, he had to tell her goodbye. But as he opened his mouth, he surprised himself by telling her she was going to have a great year.

And somewhere out there she was waiting for him.


End file.
